Wednesday comes after Tuesday...and now it's Thursday again

Tuesday, I left the office early, managed to ride the MRT at around 5:30pm, just before the great rush hour rush. I couldn't resist though, and treated myself to a Greenwich Pizza, Lasagna and Pizza Fries meal before heading home. Yes, takaw ako. This was just before dinner. Hmmm.

Grateful for: a speedy and convenient commute, to and from the office.

Wednesday, I am thankful for:

- managing to ride another Ortigas Flyover bus from Cubao (2 days straight, rare!)

- transitions

- riding home with B.

- watching Inception

- movie foood!

Thursday, thankful for:

- being able to change my mind

- second chances

- and hopefully, waking up late later.

Monday

It's a Monday.

Thankful for:

• Zoe's first day at school after a week's absence
• Watching The Sorcerer's Apprentice
• Chances
• A Singapore Vacation and Birthday party

Midnight Snack

Donuts and coffee, c/o B.

I really like the honey glazed donut, served warm and toasty (not pictured here, nakain ko na eh, hehe). Thanks B.

Bagyo Bagyo

Typhoon “Basyang” (international codename: Conson) came barging into Metro Manila last night. A little past midnight, the power went out in our area. It was restored roughly 12 hours later. We were lucky though -- other areas still have no power up to now.

I am thankful for:

• Being able to give Zoe her anti-fever medicine around 11:30pm. She was so sweet, wala yung usual na angal nya. Siguro sobrang sleepy na sya nun. After drinking her meds, she promptly went back to sleep. Ang saya! And I thought it would be another stressful event...
• Zoe slept soundly thru the storm, despite the strong winds, and the various creaking and huffing and puffing sounds. Parang may liliparin na bubong!
• Wala na yung fever ni Zoe! After almost 5 days! Weee!!! When she woke up today, her fever was gone. Cough na lang.
• That our house is still intact. And we're all still safe.

Don't Blame This Sleeping Satellite

"I blame you for the moonlit sky
and the dream that died
with the eagles' flight

I blame you for the moonlit nights
when I wonder why
are the seas still dry?

Don't blame this sleeping satellite..."

- Tasmin Archer, Sleeping Satellite

Thankful Notes:

• Friday -- Thankful for my Mom, her birthday, and her birthday treat. But most especially, thankful for my mom.

• The weekend -- Saturday and Sunday were a blur. The daughter was sick, and had on-off fever since Friday afternoon. Up to now, she's still sick.
  
  "Mommy, may sakit ako," she whispers so sadly. Her voice is also gone. She has had cough and fevers, and sometimes a runny nose. We had a check-up with the doctor today, and she just gave meds for fever, allergies and cough. Apparently, the cause is suspected to be viral. But her fever does have to go down by Wednesday, or else a blood count will need to be done. She probably caught the virus in school, since nobody in the house is sick. Yet. B asked his mom to have "tawas" done though, and there were a lot of "shapes". Na-matanda daw. Ewan. Basta, sana gumaling na sya.
  
  The thankful note -- she started to eat a regular meal again. Matamlay pa rin, pero at least by Sunday she ate lunch and dinner.

• Monday -- Spent the whole day with the daughter. By dinner time, sabi ni daughter: "Nasaan na si daddy?" She wouldn't eat dinner or drink her medicine until daddy's home. Naku po. She also didn't want to drink her fever medicine, which is really important because she has had the fever for almost 3 days already.
  
  "Sobrang tamis!" she complains. Wow, nag complain na matamis! But practically all kiddie medicines are sweet!
  
  "Susuka ako dyan eh," she cries. That won't happen, we (the yaya and I) tell her. Eventually she relents and drinks the pink concoction. And two seconds later...she pukes. O.M.G.
  
  Thankful for: Quality time with Zoe. The yaya for cleaning up the puke. Hehe. Daddy B. for doing nightwatch...and our cool comfy bed.

Cliches and other musings

Warning: long post delving into motherhood and domestic matters. Read at your own risk. Don't complain if bored.

"It's 3 AM I must be lonely..."
- Matchbox 20

It's actually 2 AM here. I am hungry, thirsty and feeling so flabby. Everything's yin and yang, this and that, push and pull, surprises and blessings. They say to whom much is given, much is expected. I am in a funk, and I know I can get out of it, but only if I choose to. Right now all I'm feeling is -- tired, hungry, thirsty and flabby.

Yes, I need those endorphins, and I need them quick. Unfortunately...yes, I feel lazy, hungry, thirsty and flabby. I should change. Late nights are not healthy, especially if I have to wake up regularly before 7AM so that the kid can get ready for school on time. 3 AM bed times do not work with 7 AM wake-up times, not if this has to go on for 5-days a week.

My guilty confession is -- I can't sleep when something's troubling me. Or when I can't properly identify what's troubling me. I used to watch brainless TV shows at home -- the mindless noise probably calms my brain. But I can't even do that now. No TV. The maid sleeps in our sala, and that's where the TV is. Ha, I'm a prisoner of my own device. Well, actually she has a room, but she complains it's too hot there, and most of our electric fans are really busted.

Anyway, sometimes I do miss the freedom I had in my childhood home. Wow, weird gripe huh? I should have more freedom now right? I'm the Queen Bee, the queen of the domain, the queen of the castle. Yes. And the castle is expensive. And high maintenance.

I mention about mixed surprises. Last Saturday, was a milestone. Zoe decided to sleep the night in her own room. "Love ko sya sobra," she said about her room. You see, the kid co-sleeps with us, and suddenly, she has now fully accepted that the room opposite ours was her own room. Which is great right? This is what we were aiming for. This is why she had a hand in choosing her room color (light blue, yes she's so not kikay), why we bought the furniture (bed and cabinets), and why we painted her room like Twitter (light blue with white clouds). We wanted it to be her place, her "crib" -- a place to dream, a place to be herself. She was already playing in her room, and taking afternoon naps there. We were surprised though that she wanted to sleep the night there. So soon.

We were not ready.

Really. We weren't. This was the end-goal we wanted, but we were simply not ready yet. Or maybe it's just me. Look at us now. 5 days later, the big daddy is sleeping with Zoe in one single-size bed. They have the electric fan (yes, we have an electric fan shortage), and I'm sleeping in our bedroom, alone with no electric fan. It's nice that it's breezy sometimes here, but it gets hot and sweaty when there's no breeze. Do the parents look ready? Is this a sustainable scenario?

Sigh.

Alone, in a big bed. I guess, this is a reward of sorts for all of those nights Zoe keeps kicking me in the face while we're sleeping, and "getting" my bed space whenever I have late night meetings. Haha. Those nights, I was imagining buying another bed all for myself. Mixed surprises right? Now I have the whole bed to myself. Wee.

So Zoe sleeps in her own room now, in her own bed, but she expects either one of us to be right there beside her and hug her while she's sleeping. Hmmm.

This is B's fault (he knows this). Zoe as a baby was sleeping so happily and peacefully on her own in her own crib, before all this happened. She's an amazing baby -- after the first few months, she slept the whole night uninterrupted. She didn't complain about full diapers, so no need to change diapers in the middle of the night. Amazing. Until one day...B felt guilty with the long hours he spent at the office. He came home late, and always encountered Zoe already asleep. He missed being with his baby, so he took a sleeping Zoe from the crib, and put her in our bed. This happened frequently, such that, Zoe didn't want to sleep in the crib anymore. She wanted to sleep with us. We were now, officially, co-sleeping.

Co-sleeping isn't all that bad though. It sure made travelling around easier. She could sleep anywhere, as long as it was between the two of us. No more need to lug around a portable crib, book an extra bed, or bring a comfort toy or something. We could just pack our clothes and go.

The fact that she didn't want to sleep in her crib also helped us in removing Zoe's thumbsucking habit. We told her only babies suck their thumbs, and babies slept in cribs, so if she wanted to suck her thumb, she can, but since she's a baby that way, she can sleep in her crib and not on our bed. It worked. Thumb sucking removed in a few days! Gone was my irrational fear that I'd see a 10-year old Zoe still sucking her thumb while riding the jeepney. I guess she saw our bed as the "transition" from baby-hood to bata-hood.

And now, her own bed makes her a bigger bata.

As a parent, I am thankful. And hopeful that all this reasonable-ness persists. As a person with my own life, I'm thinking, I need to get a life! I need to exercise, get endorphins, which I haven't done in such a long long time.

"Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy.
Happy people just don't shoot their husbands, they just don't."
-Elle Woods in Legally Blonde

I wouldn't want to shoot anybody right? Least of all myself. Now only if I could discipline myself to make time for it...

Always Zoku - San Chome Me No Yuhi

ALWAYS 続・三丁目の夕日

Watched "Always -- Sunset on Third Street 2", with good friends from college. The movie is part of Eiga Sai 2010, Japanese films screened at Shangrila Mall for free. It was great, and I liked it. Great CGI effects too -- I mean, to show old 1950's Tokyo and integrate it seamlessly into a fun and also dramatic storyline -- that takes talent and passion. And we always appreciate that. So thank you. :)

The filmfest runs until July 11, 2010. You can check out Click the City's site for details on the schedules and films.

Thankful for: good stories, good friends and good meals.

The Thankful Wave

"Think about what's right, what's good, what's valuable & fulfilling. The more you focus on the good things, the more abundant they become."

- Ralph Marston

A lot of people are on a "thankful" spree nowadays. And for that, we are thankful. Life is indeed happier when we are thankful for something.