one more day

One more day to go before the Samsung AXN Challenge....I'm excited, but I'm also afraid. It's my first adventure race (not counting the utrekarera race within our small group), and of course I am afraid. I'm pretty sure I'm not as fast as the race veterans, but what if they're too fast and they bump into me and I can't jump out of the way in time and I fall splat straight towards the asphalt ground and I have to cry because the injury hurts too much? Waaa!

Sigh...breathe in....breathe out....in any case, I learned a lot in the short month that we've been preparing. I learned to ride a bike around the metro, rollerblade (sort of, I can still walk faster), sisid (yes I never learned to do that before), rappel properly, and dragon-boat row. I learned that rowing is an interesting sport, as long as 1) I overcome this inability to wake up very early, and 2) I keep at it because my endurance at this sport isn't really all that good.

I'm afraid. But right now, I should concentrate at my work. Stupid work and reworks. Reworks not my fault but I have to do them, and I can't bring myself to concentrate enough on the task at hand. You know how sometimes when you're done with a project, you don't want to think about it anymore? Well, here it is. I don't want to think about it. I am concentrating very hard to re-format my brilliant solution into the new framework being designed by other people. I mean, that's well and good and as it should be, but the problem is, there's a time frame, a project deadline I was trying to catch. And now more work needs to be done but the project deadline did not move at all. And it's my fault since I can't concentrate. I can't think. I want to be a mindless athlete earning big bucks. Or a social butterfly who just needs to be charming and doesn't need to actually do any work. Bah! Why am I complaining. This is my bread and butter. This feeds my whims and fancies.

Some days I like my work. And some days...I just want to leave it all behind.